Pansy Power proves persuasive

s6 is enjoying her 'wife' relationship with her Master. But recently Master has become enamoured of the idea of s6 being treated much of the time as a pansy. In part this was triggered by looking at some of the posts about s7 which introduced the term to them. (I suspect that 'pansy' isn't a normal US term, at least in the non-floral sense - a colonial cousin may care to confirm or enlighten.)

A first step seems to have been Master tying a sweet little pink ribbon around s6's sweetness (what s7 would call her princess) for one of their lovemaking sessions. ("A real man would never have a pink ribbon there, but a pansy would"). But it was clear that much much more was over the horizon.

MissBehaviour is always eager to build on events like that. She made a suggestion, which grew into a small plot hatched between her and s6. The ribbon had more uses than just decoration - uses that were very pansy! And we were starting with one of the more obvious ones, though hopefully still a pleasant surprise for her Master.

s6 was asked to find some long lengths of pink ribbon (several feet) and some sweet pink labels. This she did during some subsequent shopping, finding nice long pink lace ribbon.

The labels were to be decorated suitably. We discussed this and came up with three ideas: Master's pansy, his 'pet' name for her (which is not public) and something recognising MissBehaviour. And as you can see they all look so sweet. (I know pansy and sissy shouldn't be capitalised, but the font I used, Fiolex Girls, had such sweet hearts in Upper Case that I just had to show you!)

Now of course the labels would be attached to lengths of that sweet ribbon. s6 would have the labels tucked into her skirt waistband when she was performing domestic duties before Master came home. Then, when her man arrived, she would hand them to him, for his amusement and instrument of control. The ribbons snaked from the waistband, down to the skirt hem and then back up underneath to a convenient 'anchor point', that was buried beneath some sweet pink girlie panties.

She suggested using two lengths of ribbon, one from the front, and another down the back - an idea I accepted gratefully. (I very much approve of my houris being imaginative.) So that is what she did.

The perfect opportunity was St Valentine's Day. She dolled up in her best girlie outfit: pink 4" heels, white stockings, pink garter belt with white lace, pink full-cut panties trimmed with white lace and a large bow/ribbon in the back, pink bra with pink ribbons, pink choker, short petticoat and long sleeved pink satin dress with hem to just below stocking tops, white lace at wrist and collar. Then of course the sweet ribbons - one down the front of the skirt, the other falling across her derrière.

Master arrived home. Limp-wristed and mincing, she handed over one of her pink pansy reins....

We can imagine what then transpired....

A perfect pansy performance

Girlie Shirley

Shirley is so Girlie

well - really a Pansy

Come and get me!
© SaraShirley 2011

s7 has been gradually and slowly becoming more and more of a sissy. Her Mistress, Sara, makes no bones about it, as you can see in her comment to one of my recent posts. shirley (s7's name) acknowledges her sexual inadequacy for women, and in accordance with her Mistress's instructions, and with some training from MissBehaviour, she's finding sexual release in their preferred circumstances - as a transvestite sissy. The sort you'll see on that sweet picture of her to the left - one who want to be seen as a mincing nancy!

Panties MUST be inspected
© SaraShirley 2011

Like a lot of enlightened Dommes, Sara believes that physical chastity and denial is only an occasional tool, but mental restraint for moderate periods, supplemented by bouts of arousal and release under supervised conditions can be excellent developmental tools.
She has implemented such a regime, with some sweet rules.

• shirley has to accumulate 'credits' before she's allowed 'chat-time' and when she does she often has very strict deadlines by when she must leave
• She is only allowed 'play' inside tights and panties, and must keep them on afterwards for inspection. You'll see Sara's inspection caption to the right.
• She must seek permission for 'creamy-pies' from a Mistress
• She may not email or phone and will often be required to retain a record of her chat so Mistress Sara may subsequently examine her behaviour.

Not interested? I don't think so....
© SaraShirley 2011

MissBehaviour has had some contact with them for some time, but in the last year or so, they have been working strongly on shirley's role as a cock-obsessed pansy. MissBehaviour has been involved in some of this training, mostly with conditioning her to become very comfortable with impressive manhoods.

This development also included dildo training to give her some initial oral experience. And Sara has also been supervising online sessions with 'Masters' where shirley describes her performance in exquisite and humiliating detail. As we can see in the picture to the left, she finds this very arousing, as well as an example of Sara's precise wit.

And most recently she has been moved on significantly in her pansy development: shirley would have to pleasure a real man (P) who was spending the night at their home. The intensity of her first kneeling and unzipping, in Sara's presence, was heightened by shirley having to beg to be allowed permission, thus showing just how much of a cock-craving pansy she had become. The oral sex that followed was sweet and gentle, as was the going to bed afterwards (which didn't involve more sex - the development is deliberately slow).

Princess peeks from pansy
© SaraShirley 2011

Of course it isn't all plain sailing - s7 made a serious error in borrowing one of Mistress' dresses, which was subsequently punished by a defrocking and regime of trousers. And this has caused some problems! shirley was permitted a skirt for the online cock-sucking above, but trousers went back on immediately afterwards (Sara was supervising of course and you can see that s7 hadn't been permitted to smooth her legs!)

Today she was privileged to have a nice session with MissBehaviour: shirley was allowed her favourite white body, because of her somewhat pleading comment and subsequent phone call with Sara. The body ended up very satisfactorily creamed. Her previous release had been four weeks previously, when she had her last skirted milking, so princess made quite a big little mess!  And I'm sure you want to see what princess looks like... Seek no further folks, but eyes right!

I'm sure many of you will have other thoughts about shirley's humiliation.
Do let her know....

Aunties and 'Niece'

Previously on MissBehaviour:
s4 has enjoyed her aunt's underwear alongside many other dares from MissBehaviour, which I've described previously. In that post I hinted at contact with a possible 'Aunt' (mature TV) and her wife for a developing relationship. Well dears - it's happened! And here I'll tell you a little circumspectly about it^[1].

s4 met the TV (codename A) in a common sissy chat room and they got on very well. A's wife (codename S, and who definitely 'wears the pants' in the marriage) was also rather interested. They then agreed to meet on neutral group (a pub!) to see how things might go. Now you have to realise that s4 is a young sweet thing who exhibits quite a little nervousness and this was evident. She'd asked MissBehaviour's advice, which naturally was that wearing lingerie (her aunt's) underneath male attire would not only even be appropriate, it would also be anticipated by S and A.

Well - the reader won't be at all surprised that S insisted s4 sit next to her at a quiet corner table, and A (who often acts as and dresses as a maid) was detailed to fetch-and-carry. Conversation of course turned to s4's interest in ladies underwear and how shall we put it, someone's hand was busy gauging the reaction to such interrogation. After a while it was clear that there was a good degree of compatibility and they retired to S&A's home to continue gentle introduction.

A was dismissed fairly early on and pretty soon some 'underwear comparison' took place followed by some gentle introductory manual stimulation. We won't think poorly of the sweetie that she didn't last very long while on her knees in front of her new Aunt, and subjected to pedal excitement. And later the first lessons on pleasuring the female took place in S's panties...

The sleepover...

A subsequent 'vanilla' meeting in a pub, with reflection and discussion, led to an invitation to sleep-over at their house on a subsequent Saturday. Now things were getting serious! Niece was staying with her Aunties. Someday we may have some photos to illustrate. Meanwhile here is a partial account: imagination can probably extrapolate the details!^[2]

Of course the very shy niece had to be made-up and dressed correctly and it would start with her just in knickers. S spent a pleasant hour or so on this process, with the occasional feel to check that her niece was enjoying herself. A picture of modesty resulted: a flower pattern cream silk dress over a slip and with stockings. Then the fully dressed girl was led downstairs to have a nice quiet dinner with her Aunts - naturally A was dressed as a maid and provided the domestic service.

Dinner over, cuddling on the sofa was the order of the evening and hands wandered a little. Naturally Aunt S was taking the lead as her niece has a delightful streak of shyness and 'innocence', that no doubt was one attraction to her. They actually talked about some of the dares MissBehaviour had given s4!

Then some minor infraction on maid A's part was sufficient to move the subject onto spanking and in short order Aunt S was training her niece in how to spank the maid. She was also encouraged to check whether the maid was enjoying the punishment too much, by feeling her pantie-front underneath.

A was sent up to bed (her own room) and later Aunt and niece retired to the master bedroom. Suffice it to say that during the night s4 got introduced to certain pleasures she's never had before, especially losing her virginity. (I told you this was a very sweet story.)

Next morning the maid brought them breakfast in bed. The sight of the niece wearing her wife's nightie was very erotic, and Aunt couldn't resist gently stroking her niece while her 'husband' (who was probably very well aware) was fussing with the breakfast things. The two left the bedroom eventually around midday and after another dressing session, Aunt S drove her niece home. I believe she gave her a nice parting present - something that she'd worn very close to herself that day... We're sure those panties have figured greatly in s4's activities since then.

They meet again soon - and we look forward to details. I'm sure some of the Aunts or niece might like to furnish some more details for the readers, via comments.


[1] The parties are aware of this posting.
[2] It is sometimes awkward to preserve circumspection when you don't know what each party knows of what you know - luckily indiscretions amongst them aren't going to be very serious.

Now who wears the pants?....

previously on MissBehaviour...

Trousers and heels - are they killers?
© SaraShirley 2011

s7 has unfortunately been defrocked. It was her own fault. And she paid for it, both figuratively and literally. No more skirts. Trousers only.

So what does she look like? We promised you a view and here is the first.

We look forward to others as we explore the sex-kitten's new wardrobe.

For the Love of a Sissy

It is so heart-warming when you find wonderful expressions of trust and love. The responses of s7 and her Mistress Sara to my post on training sissies are just such examples.  I urge my Harem and other followers to read them. It shows how even in the apparent mixed-up situations of sissydom and cuckoldry, deep loving relationships can still survive and even grow. (You'll find similar in the case of s2 and her Mistress, as well as molly and Diane in Bi and Large....)

In those comments s7 describes her own thoughts about her first male oral encounter and her acceptance and indeed growing longing for that. Sara describes why she encourages her transvestite sissy husband Shirley^[1] to express her own sexual needs in several ways that will never again involve intercourse with a woman. This is well worth reading.

And it also suggested something that I couldn't help but giggle at:

"Shirley is so Girlie"

[1] I only reveal the 'names' of sissies if they, or a responsible guardian, do so or request it. As a member of my Harem of course she will be referred to normally as s7.

Dares, Challenges and A Competition

previously on MissBehaviour...
Training of my sissies involves various usually thoughtful, but sometimes spontaneous, actions. I've described 'member-conditioning' for those of a distinctly bisexual persuasion and context, but left hints about dares and challenges. These teases need some degree of resolution to assuage the thirsts for 'kink' that my readership and my Harem seem to develop. And to encourage everyone to read on, digest, think and smile, there will be a competition.

Now keep calm....
it's just one of MissBehaviour's dares

A cursory glance at the postings in this blog will reveal that many of the sissies/subs in my harem have been privileged to receive dares and challenges from MissBehaviour. These can range from something really quite 'risky' in public to a loving suggestion for a private occasion between Master and 'wife'. Some houris^[1] actually want dares almost constantly - s4 is so sweet about this that I often have a little trouble thinking of something suitable.

Challenges are fun - both for Mistress and for the houri. They both develop and excite at the same time. The difficult part is to design just enough to ensure anticipation is mostly positive, risk and thrill is acceptable and ultimate reward satisfactory. Some factors to consider are:

• What is reasonably possible?
• Have they done something else that can be built upon?
• How much risk should we add?
• Is an element of humiliation required?

Most of my harem are deeply enamoured of ladies' underwear, so that pretty much always features in any dare in some form or other. Climax is often built in as a reward or a central part of the challenge, but need not always be so.

Some dares can be private and have their own fun. s2 and s6 have been given little 'suggestions' about actions to perform that, whilst with a little risk of humiliation in front of the partner, add a frisson of spice to the (usually sexual) entertainment. A good example is described in Follow the Lingerie Road..... where s6 was dared to make herself extra-specially inviting for her Master.

Some challenges thrive on being in semi-public. Very early ones with s7 were very sweet, and with her Mistress's distinct connivance and approval. She was ordered to have one of her Mistress's bras in her panties when at a pub for the evening and 'milk' herself into it.... Several of s1's most memorable dares were in public - buying 'top-shelf' magazines ostentatiously in a newsagent when a number of older teenagers were around^[2] and a series of fruit 'enjoyments' in her parked car are just a few simple examples. Quickies for s4 have sometimes involved going lingerie-clad into her garden to enjoy an 'exposed' masturbation.

'Interesting' underwear
© MissBehaviour 2011

Some of course particularly appreciate a humiliation aspect to their 'enjoyment' - s5 and s9 are the main culprits here. The easiest way to achieve this is to order them to buy some interesting items of ladies' lingerie in circumstances that are guaranteed to heighten their embarrassment. Tasking them to buy something not quite so common, such as a longline bra, which needs searching out specialist foundation-wear stores or at a time and place when there are plenty of other women around can work wonders. (s5 had to buy some lingerie from TopShop on a Saturday afternoon - the place was of course full of teenage girls ;-)

It's rare that a challenge is repeated, though sometimes it might be best to 'do it again' with an additional element generating extra frisson. One of the best examples of this is s4's lovely first steps in bikini sunbathing in a local park. She obviously relished the thrill, so the obvious next step was to push it that extra rather naughty step, by adding an orgasmic requirement. And the little sweetie completed it.

The Competition

Ecstatic at being one of MissBehaviour's houris
Aroused but scared of what challenge she'll face

Well - it's pretty obvious... Suggest a challenge either for one of my Harem specifically, or something rather more general. The simplest way is to add to the comments below. (I might also put in a little poll later.)

The most 'interesting' challenge will be given to one or more of my Harem to complete and report! 

Don't be shy or retiring, or hold back ("they won't do that will they?") - let MissBehaviour be the judge^[3]. Get your thinking caps on!

[1] I've used 'member of my Harem' too much, and sub/sissy is too bimodal. Until I tire of it, houri will be the word I'll use.
[2] s1 is a lady ;-), so this was a dare to get giggles and stares at her buying and perusing some magazines full of very-well-endowed (o  )(  o) girls...
[3] MissBehaviour's decision is final of course and modifications for practicality, privacy or just plain common sense may be necessary.

Embarrassment? Oh - it's much more than that...

s5 is one of those who loves humiliation

A pansy's shrine
© MBHs5 2011

You might even say she craves it. She just simply wants to be embarrassed, shamed, called a variety of humbling and degrading names, considered a pansy (and much stronger), and generally denigrated as any form of proper male.

Nothing especially unusual in that and strong sexual interest in ladies' underwear and other garments isn't unknown with such individuals. Obviously excessive masturbation (or 'self-abuse' as our Victorian forbears so charmingly phrased it) figures strongly in the activities of such individuals. And inevitably this uses those wonderful women's garments as objects and aids to such self-stimulation - often to the point of 'creaming'.

Proud to be in
MissBehaviour's Harem
© MBHs5 2011

MissBehaviour has had sporadic cyber-contact with s5 for a few years, giving her a series of challenges to develop (and embarrass) her. Some of those have involved shopping for lingerie in situations designed to maximise humiliation opportunity ("Won't it be fun buying that little pink bra-and-pantie set from Next when the shop is full of groups of teenage girls?"). Another nice one was ordering her to buy a love-doll from a local sex-shop and have to ask the (female) assistant for advice on the correct choice.

Others have just been simply to get her even more sexually enamoured of ladies' 'unmentionables'. Whilst shopping reinforces the interest ("browse through the girdles in the lingerie section of that high-class department store"), wearing lingerie everyday continues to build possibilities of exposure and arousal ("make sure you wear that black brassière under a white shirt".)

A scattering of women's undies
© MBHs5 2011

But for s5 one of the highlights has been ordering her to build and use a 'shrine' devoted to women's underwear. Big long sessions of solo 'worship' take place, sometimes over many hours. Afterwards she adores the shame of having to confess her disgraceful activities (as well as the inevitable 'soreness' being a constant reminder.)

And recently she has taken some photographs of this place of worship for us all to see and laugh at.

Isn't she a sweetie? 

Or do some of my readers have other suitable epithets they'd care to share?

A sissy defrocked

As I said earlier "Sissies sometimes get into trouble..." The assiduous amongst you will have devoured the comments therein and discovered that sweet s7 was about to face a hideous fate:

She was no longer to wear skirts

This was going to be traumatic, but a deserved punitive consequence of her unwise actions, decided with commendable alacrity by her Mistress/Wife. [Her skirts were going to be vacuum-packed away as clearly s7 'cannot be trusted'.] But she also had to provide compensation by paying for (and thus acquiring) the offending skirt, as well as the co-ordinating tights. This would happen through part-payments out of her allowance for nearly three months.

Such a wonderful skirt
- such a pity

The trousered female can still be very sexy though, with many many styles to choose between (MissBehaviour loves tight slinky ones especially) and s7 will certainly still be a sweet attractive sissy. Later on, when she has her female culottes we'll see what image she can now project. I hope that leggings feature strongly, but that's just my thing.

Lovely legs
Gorgeous tights
excited princess

But before she finally gets defrocked, she was permitted some last fun in a skirt. And naturally it was in the lovely skirt that got her into trouble, as i) she loved the skirt, ii) it was almost poetic justice, iii) it would be the last time she'd wear the skirt and iv) it would be the first (and last) time she'd have 'creamypies' in it.

This happened in a session conducted by MissBehaviour on the last afternoon she'd be skirted.

Her last skirted milking.

An hour after, she would be permanently trousered and taken out to buy some additional suitable garments.

s7 is only permitted her climaxes within panties and often tights as well - rules drawn up by her Mistress several years ago to reinforce her sissy nature. Naturally MissBehaviour would build on this, insisting on the co-ordinating tights being worn too. They were actually a really lovely pair and I do hope she is permitted to wear them again in the future, on special occasions and when she's been good, unlike the skirt.

So MissBehaviour treated s7 to a good deal of teasing, encouraging her to stroke gently, get excited and aroused, while subtly reminding her of her status and immediate future. Her skirt was permitted to be raised pro tem to make initial stiffness easier, but ultimately the lovely skirt was demurely draped to ankle and fingertip pressure and encouraging phrases and countdown from MB led to the inevitable (and last) eruption buried deep within panties, tights and skirt. And then to complete the effect, the sweet girl took a little picture as evidence.

Thirty minutes later, Mistress was home, and s7 was taken to buy some examples of her new female apparel. A new era dawned. Here are pictures of the trousered sweetie.

But I Digress...

  MissBehaviour's blog needs a little more variety of style. 

  Thus far you've been treated to three sorts of posts, all carefully crafted in content and vocabulary: i) The not-so-secrets of my 'Harem', giving an insight into both the variety of subs and sissies I've accumulated and how I treat them; ii) philosophical ramblings around the whole issue of (TV) domination and iii) vanity publishing for MissBehaviour.
  Obviously these broad categories will continue - there are a few exploits of harem houris still 'on the stocks' for publication in future weeks, I cannot suppress 'thinking on paper' and equally well MissBehaviour's ego needs occasional massaging^[1], often through pictorial exposure. But I digress...

MissBehaviour's blog needs a little more variety of style. 

  Should I perhaps be somewhat Sterner? Should I rail against small niggling little annoyances or ponder on strange behaviours and moral inconsistencies?

  Last weekend for example our colonial cousins indulged in what has been described as the secular holy day involving some apparent variant of Rugby football played out in front of a myriad of fans, supporters and assorted onlookers. Indeed several noted bloggers around these parts made special efforts with parties, wagers and other nefarious activities (best not to enquire too closely) to 'enjoy' themselves while viewing the spectacle.

  And all this for a case where there wasn't even a hint (in public at least) of a misplaced nipple or an accidentally-over-exposed mammary. Masters and Mistresses of the dominating arts, well-skilled Dom(me)s and cheerfully suffering subs, Ladies strongly desirous of Cock and Bulls newly cuckolding — all reduced to tribal hangers-on. And an event where the highlight was a demonstration of remote starting of an internal-combustion engine.

  Oh - and everyone went into a complete tizzy about some 'singer' fluffing.

  Sorry - I mean forgetting one of the lines of a National Anthem. An anthem commemorating the bombardment of a (Yankee) group that couldn't see the caring nature of His Majesty's navy, nor the entertainment value in the display of fireworks released in their honour. An anthem that is actually set to a British drinking song - a song for quaffing Shandy or stronger. But I digress...

  Those fireworks were an early experimentation by the British - developed in India, they were judged suitable to entertain the colonial cousins during one of their 'tantrums'. Even the French were given them as a treat, though it wasn't without some risk to the giver: 'and one of these, following me like a squib until its shell exploded, actually put me in more danger than all the fire of the enemy throughout the day'. But I digress...

  National Anthems are peculiar objects. The British have one, but while the Welsh and Scots have their (subsidiary) ones, the English do not. (Northern Ireland is just too complex to contemplate: "They blame it on Cromwell and William the Third" - Flanders & Swann). But the third verse of the British Anthem calls for the destruction (actually crushing) of one part of the nation - the Scots again. (This verse is normally not sung - I wonder why? What say you Tristram?). But I digress...

[1] The honorary proof-reader (1-1) suggested Madam needs her ego stroking more often than she cares to admit.

The subDomme dilemma

Philosophical Musings Warning

Is domination associative, transitive or both?

Domme/sub relationships described well can be arousing^[1], but cases where a female Domme is also a sub to someone else are fascinating.

I'm not talking about switching in a couple (which can have its own charms) but where the female Domme both controls her sub and in turn also surrenders herself to or is otherwise controlled by another Dom(me). The main interest is in the dilemmas and joys-of-tension that the lady-in-the-middle faces, how play, 24/7 and balance interact, and how the poor sub at the bottom of the heap fares. The Top Domme may have her own needs, but she can take care of herself.

Here I'll just muse and reflect about the situation. No judgements are made, no profound insights should be discerned, no even-remotely-firm conclusions will be drawn. Assume everything is qualified with 'maybe', 'might' or 'possibly'. My tone will tend to the jocular when I can, so I hope it also amuses. But beware: there are many arguments and some quite strong differences of opinion on this topic — these are only my thoughts — 'Tis the wind, and nothing more.

I have three (hot) examples from the 'blogosphere' I'll use to illustrate, discuss and muse. All I know about the first two comes from their blogs. For this post Domme names are emboldened and any abbreviations should be self-evident. All errors are mine and if anyone feels slighted or misjudged, please holler. These examples are:

• Molly in Under Contract To My Wife, where she has a cyber-Master (the 'Western Correspondent') with whom she has heavily orgasmic sessions with some regularity. Whilst the bulk of the (almost daily) narrative is written by the 'slave' (Mick) there is a lot of additional material provided by the others involved, mostly in comments.
• Diane in Bi and Large..., who has a physical Mistress (Sandra) who she meets frequently. A strong 'threesome' is developing rapidly, with the sub ('hubwife', formerly Michelle) definitely at the bottom of the heap. The blog is written exclusively by Diane^[2].
• s1, one of my subs, who has a strong and well-established D/s relationship with her cuckolded and feminized husband (s1_v) but is also very cyber-beholden to MissBehaviour. (Some exploits are described on the blog.) All material described here is from my own experience and point-of-view. It is also deliberately circumspect.

From Domme to subDomme

All three seem well-established as a Domme within marriage before adding and developing the submissive relationship - I suspect it will be rare the other way round,  though one could foresee possibilities. But the initial triggers toward submission vary somewhat:

• Diane 'fell in love' with another woman.... and that head-over-heels progressed towards something with a power dimension. 'hubwife' just had to accept what inevitably was happening.
• Molly (and Mick) decided that some 'cuckoldry' element would add some additional spice, and they advertised for suitable candidates. (The cuckoldry hasn't yet become 'physical'. Given the fun evident in the relationship, any such might not be as traumatic as is sometimes the case in other D/s cuckold situations.)
• s1 and MissBehaviour met serendipitously while temporarily fleeing from an 'improved' chat site to a safe-haven. We 'clicked' pretty quickly and it was clear MB was able to feed her with some of the type of mental domination she needed.

What is it that these ladies wanted in addition to their control in Domme mode ^[3]? Obviously in Diane's case there was a very strong (physical) sexual need that 'hubwife' couldn't satisfy (but paradoxically another lady could!), but for Molly and s1 they had apparently highly satisfactory sources on tap.

A distinct possibility is wishing temporarily to relinquish responsibility, by handing over (sexual) control to another and do this in a way that deeply pleasures and satisfies in the sex context she has grown to love. Molly's weekly switch two hours satisfies that in part (Mick finds it terribly hard work, and as the lowest-paid employee in UCTMW Inc feels that these types of  fringe benefit could be much more generous ;-), but using the sub in switch-mode probably doesn't really satisfy the 'surrender' element. To achieve this needs a third party.

Or it might simply be just plain fun!

The Domme's Dom(me)

The choice of who will dominate the dominatrix is critical of course, especially if, as here, the intention is not to destroy the existing (and presumably very satisfactory) D/s relationship already in place and possibly even enhance it. In two of our cases domination comes from cyberspace primarily (MB/s1 is through chat and email, WC/Molly uses email, blog & phone), in the other it is physical.

Trust, humour, imagination and intelligence are essential. The ability to seize opportunities and remarks and turn them into action can really make things work. Excellent examples include Sandra exploiting a daydreaming moment by Diane to trigger a further stage in 'pet development', MB building a whole set of scenarios from an offhand remark by s1_v and many occasions where Molly's WC will make salacious suggestions via text, often at or after bedtime.

For the cyber cases, the remote sexual domination (mind-fucking is an excellent term) can be supplemented physically. Supervised masturbation of course is pretty central... the Hitachi makes itself worth-its-weight in helping with intensity. (Mick has been in deep trouble when the toy has been mislaid.) And in some cases the sub can act as a physical surrogate, being directed closely by the remote Dom(me), though it needs very clear bounds and high trust in the sub (which is definitely the case in our examples.) s1_v has been eminently successful in such a role for MB/s1, in part from the extensive training she had from her Mistress. There is some evidence of WC 'strongly suggesting' actions for Mick to execute during the couple's switch two hours.

What about the poor (old) sub?

Part of the difficulty in keeping the balance and enjoyment for all is what happens to the bottom of the heap. Assuming he doesn't really get off by being totally ignored, then he needs attention and directive attention, but what, from whom, when and how? If we assume the TopDomme does know about the sub, then what is the dynamic between all three parties?

This is where transitivity and associativity from the strap line enter.
   Does the bottom sub get dominated directly by the  Domme [transitivity]?
   Does "(Domme → domme) → sub" ≡ "Domme → (domme → sub)" [associativity]?
Enquiring minds want to know, and seek evidence.

In two situations the transitivity is strong, in the other less so.

• In Diane's case the issue of when, whether and how Sandra dominates 'hubwife' is the subject of some almost heated arguments in the blog's comments. This relationship is becoming a strong close threesome and 'hubwife' already provides domestic service to her TopDomme weekly, sometimes with a degree of hilarity. But even here Diane is experiencing the dilemma and some of the comments in reaction to her blog are becoming a little acerbic, and perhaps not helpful.
• MB has free-rein to domme s1_v  directly (this has been made clear several times by s1) and she does as circumstances permit, though primary focus is on s1 herself of course. 
• Any control of Mick by WC appears loose and jocular and mostly suggestions to Molly made during their frequent technologically-supported intercourse - this is definitely a case where the transitivity is weak.

The associativity relates to whether Domme works on domme, the resulting state operating on sub, or whether Domme works on the 'pair' as one and does it make a difference?

• MissBehaviour actually operates in both modes - often working primarily on s1 who then may 'punish' s1_v subsequently. But she also sometimes works with the pair together, with direct control of s1 punishing her sub. A fun variant of the latter is where they have to punish and arouse each other in turn, closely directed by MB. As they are very aware of each other's limits and are very experienced, this can be extremely satisfactory for all parties.
• For Diane the associativity issue becomes one of how much 'independence' she is granted or asserts or can generate herself in controlling 'hubwife'. This is fascinating and well worth following some of the twists and turns and musings in her blog. And clearly it isn't easy.
• For Molly it is much more clear cut - the Molly/Mick dynamic is really under her control alone.

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Does it matter? Well yes. The common thread amongst these is building, developing and maintaining happy relationships, with much trust and lots of fun. And central to that is all parties (including the poor (old) sub) understand what they're doing: accepting, agreeing and contributing to it, and getting pleasure from it. All are intelligent, consenting adults, who listen to each other and listen closely. And how the domination and submission is agreed, traded and controlled is crucial.

Comments are welcomed of course.. but don't get too heated. Back to lighter, dirtier or more fun stuff in future posts.

MissBehaviour 

[1] Two good 'conventional' D/s relationships I dip into are: MsMarie and All Mine (only FLRs grab my attention ;-). I'll summarise / review these in a later posting.
[2] After a particularly 'heavy' set of comments around an exceptionally powerful and intense development in their relationship, Sandra posted an appreciative 'closure' comment on behalf of Diane.
[3] The Domme advice - always experience what you are going to dish out, if only in part, whilst sound, is orthogonal to these musings.